How do we know what to do? We often determine what is correct by finding out what other people think is correct. This is especially true when there is uncertainty. We are particularly prone to follow the lead of people we perceive as similar to us.
Uncertainty is often a component of escalating aggression. The aggressive person is at a loss of what to do next. It is the uncertainty, and accompanying frustration, that leads to greater agitation.
Application
We can "normalize" the emotional response of the agitated person. If we communnicate to the agitated person that his or her emotional response is understandable given the circumstances, that they are expected--in other words, that they are normal--we can begin the defuse the situation. We can also define the normal behavioral response to the circumstance.
"Of course you're upset with all that's going on...this doesn't happen very often, but when it does, of course people get upset...and we're always able to come to a better situation when we take some time to talk about how it is I can help you."
No comments:
Post a Comment